Tuesday, 4 August 2015

How Do You Communicate With Your Other Half?

After a good few years married, living together, maybe a few kids - communication is weird. It started out all phone conversations and maybe a couple of love letters now and again. Maybe a saucy text message and whispered romantic lines. Then the kids came, and things just went weird. In our house you literally can't get a word in edge-ways, with three kids in the house one of them ALWAYS wants something. By the time the kids have gone to bed we've forgotten what we wanted to say to each other, and so we tend to communicate in a number of non-verbal ways around the kids.

Here are the ways we communicate - how do you do it?

1.) Facebook Messages

We regularly send each other links to things that we might like the other to view at some point. Obviously these are of utmost importance.

I last sent Warren a link to some lovely blouses to ask his opinion on which I should buy for my graduation. I also sent him a link to an article called "100 things to do in Liverpool" - for the summer holidays of course, and also a link to an Indian restaurant we might like to visit.

Warren last sent me a link to a video of a huge elephant-type animal scratching its back with its own gigantic penis.

 (If you would like to view this it's here. Don't say you haven't been warned about the strange content.)

He also sends me links to articles about the war and revolution and stuff. But mainly it's weird things, like videos of people falling over and odd video mash-ups. I swing from disgusted to amused.

2.)  Talking In Code

We do talk in code around the kids a lot. Mainly if we are talking about a surprise holiday, birthday presents or, more commonly, if we plan on having a secret take-away or crisp-eating at night when the kids are in bed. (Yes I know - we're really BADASS aren't we.) 

Trouble is, Warren's hearing is very bad, and my code is mainly made up of whisper and mime - the end result is Emily coming downstairs at 11pm and nicking our secret crisp stash. 


3) Text Messages

These tend to be perfunctory. "Can you pick up milk?" "What time are you home?" "How are the kids?"

Sometimes they are a bit weird. Like the time I wanted to buy us all matching Christmas onesies,

Or when we were watching old telly on Youtube in the early hours.

4.) Wild Hand Gestures

This usually happens in the supermarket. Again, if we are buying crisps or some kind of naughty snack on a Friday. There may be wild hand gesture communication if there is an austerity-busting dip to go with our crisps in the reduced yellow-stickered section.

No communication is as good as a hand gesture that says "I have single-handedly beat The Man!"


5.) Emails

These are rare-to never interesting, and always contain plans for tea and organising the kids or doing home admin.

Call be soppy, but I never delete any of these emails and I have a folder with around 10,000 home-based emails from my husband.

Communication is important isn't it :)


  1. Haha fab!My other half sent me a whatsapp about women moaning for hours but complain about an aching jaw mins into a blowjob.Git.He also sends me pics of things he wants in Asda.No please or would you mind just a pic lol.We also do the hand gestures when sneaking chocolate bars into the trolley.So naughty.

  2. Im glad i'm not the only one who saves the emails, we started as an office fling (4 years & 1 child later) & i have 1000's of emails from him, ranging from the soppy to the blunt to the "whats for tea tonight?"
    I start a new job soon & i'm still trying to work out how I can get those emails off works outlook & into my personal files!


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