Saturday, 13 December 2014

What to do with NO FRIGGING BATHROOM!!

So we are having the bathroom renovated. It has been a long time in coming and it desperately needed it. However, in between plastering and the new suite being fitted has been a gap of about erm.... A WEEK.

The bathroom door is just shut.

So everything is shit.


So, what do you do for a week? We're lucky, I mean we have a downstairs loo so we're not peeing in a bucket.

But still. What are your bathing options when you have none?

1. Use someone else's

Seems really obvious, right? Of course. Just nip to the in-laws for a shower. That's all well and good for the kids, and for my husband. But I have this real issue - it's like using the toilet - I like my own.

It somehow feels so wrong being naked in someone else's bathroom. I know, I'm weird.

2. Don't Bother

You could have a competition with yourself to see how bad you can smell? Bad idea. Don't do this. What happens if you have been on a Christmas Do and you wake up with last night's make up on and somehow you have baby oil in your hair (don't ask) and what do you do then???

a) Use someone else's shower
b) Scrub your hair in the sink
c) Nothing. Just share this embarrassing picture on the Internet for shits and giggles

It's a Christmas onesie, just in case you wondered

3. Showers Come In Cans??

We all know this, right?? I found this new deodorant, so I'm all set for days, really...

4. The Multi-Purpose Cleanser

Come on. You know what I'm talking about. Ain't nobody got time for polish and dusters anymore when you have kids. No, you don't buy separate cloths for your worktops. You know what I'm going to say.


5. There Just Isn't FIVE

You could use dry shampoo, You could do a trip wash in the kitchen, you could use the shower in the communal ones in the gym wearing your swimming costume...

Or you could just be a dick about the whole thing and vent about it on your blog because you think no-one reads it anyway and this is where you store all the secrets of your weird life.

Even the ones where you definitely absolutely smell and feel like some sort of tramp. Even if it's just a little bit.

*hibernates until middle of next week.*


  1. Go swimming. All the stink washes away in the pool, and then you've got a good excuse for shampoo & that afterwards. You have my sympathies, while I laugh at you from the comfort of the en suite.

  2. I think you should just pop round to your neighbours, because, like, that wouldn't be weird or anything, being naked in your neighbours house! x

  3. Run down the street naked in torrential rain with a squeezy bottle of Radox to hand. It's free, it's natural and it's also great excercise....two birds with one stone and all x


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