Saturday, 29 March 2014

Happy 'Mother's' Day

Happy Mother's Day. Mums.

But always remember you are not just Mums. You are so much more than that - you do lots of different jobs that you are probably not qualified to do - but you do them anyway, not always the best at everything, but you give it your all.

This post is dedicated to all the Mums out there who pretty much run the show. You're all amazing.

Please find below a selection of jobs that you actually do under the vast umbrella description that is the word 'mother.'

Nurse - Unless you are a real nurse, then nobody can do a better job than you at patching up boo-boos. Quick wash, wipe with an anti-septic, and a plaster.

Or a rub and a kiss better.

Even on a tiny cheesy toe stubbed on the skirting board.

There, there. Mummy make it all better.

Hair Dresser - Tough one. Should you use the not-so sharp scissors to trim their fringe? Do you need to use a bowl on their head? Do you wet the hair first or just give it your best guess?

Just  do what feels right.

Nothing can go wrong.

Who cut her fringe - it's TOO SHORT!

Counsellor - Do you remember when Alfie wouldn't let your toddler play on the iPad in nursery, and the time when little Johnny played with Jake to the exclusion of your baby? Or the time when Jacob asked your daughter out but told her  not to give him an answer until he had had confirmation that him and Kylie were well and truly over??



Pull up a chair love, tell me all about it.

*pours wine*

NOTE: Not for the child. For the mother. Gin is also acceptable, so I'm told.

Banker - Child has £20 to spend from birthday funds.

You put the money in a jar in the house.

Every time you go out, said child uses 'her money' to pay for 'stuff.' Stuff being; jeans, pens, notepads, books and ice cream. Times one-hundred-and-twenty-six.

Meanwhile that crisp £20 note stays un-spent in the jar.

Hmmm. Not very good at banking are you?

Cook - Super noodles, spaghetti POOPS* on toast, toast butties...

It all counts.

*My kids call Cheerios and spaghetti hoops, poops. Poops for breakfast, poops for dinner. We are all #winning.

Random tip of the day: Don't get your knife stuck in a swede.

Happy Mother's Day, Mums.

You are your children's world, and even if you aren't perfect at everything - your kids would be lost without you.

Have a lovely day! x


  1. Winston O'Boogie29 March 2014 at 23:22

    It's a turnip, not a swede.

  2. Ha ha, love this! Poops LOL. My dad once cut my fringe too short - even shorter than your gorgeous little lady's. I was 12 and I cried for days. DAYS! x


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